Opinion | Cheaper School Days

A Lesson of Real Love and Responsibility

In a world where the value of money seems to always fluctuate, I often look back into my childhood and remember those immaculate moments. Back then, things were different, school life was less expensive, and small amounts of money seemed so important. One such incident relating to school days remains with me in my life and taught me a lesson not to be forgotten pertaining to responsibility, love, and discipline.
I still remember the day My mother gave me a two rupee note and told me, in her soft voice, to use only one rupee and bring back the rest. A child that I was, I promptly nodded, feeling on top of the world at the prospect of having at least something in the pocket for the day. But as it happens with most children. I have spent spent two rupees to buy snacks, little treats, and other things that seemed important then but were utterly unnecessary.
At home, mother asked for the balance and I stuttered my way through explaining to her that I spent both. Instead of scolding me or in anger punishing me, she gave me a treatment which I shall never forget. She did not scream nor show disappointment as most would have done. Instead, she quietly explained how to handle money, the trust that she had instilled in me, and how I failed to live up to that trust. Gently yet firmly, she made me realize that all this time, I hadn’t just spent money but spent trust.
Since then, I never asked for pocket money without giving it a thought. I learned to make do with whatever little I had and was cautious with my expenditures. That one incident when mother didn’t scold but instead dealt with me so understandingly taught me responsibility that has stayed with me all my life.
Modern Times and Parenting Styles.
Fast forward to today, and I see a very different reality in the way parents and children interact, especially over money. These days, most parents hand over a hundred rupees to their children without thinking about impact. Children spend money on snacks, toys, or some useless gadgets without a thought, neither do the parents. However, this casualness can have a long term impact.
Giving out money can be very easily mistaken for a way of loving, that by not denying our children anything, we show them care. On the contrary, love does not spoil children with whatever they want materially. It means teaching discipline, responsibility, and the value of whatever they possess. When we fail to teach our children the importance of money management, we are depriving them of one of the key survival skills they will ever need in later life.
Importance of Homemade Preparations and Family Values.
If we truly love our children, we have to go back to these little yet meaningful details of parenting. Rather than giving them money to spend on worthless junk food, we must involve our children in homemade preparations. At home, I have felt that promotion of homemade food not only teaches a child the importance of appreciation for everything that comes their way but also helps knit the family together. When a child takes a packed lunch to school, that meal is so much more than nutrition; it’s also a reflection of the love and dedication a parent has devoted to its preparation. It is the modest yet powerful demonstration of affection.
Furthermore, not developing the practice of giving cash to kids does not allow them to develop an attitude of entitlement, learn to appreciate money, and differentiate between needs and wants. It is, therefore, in our hands to show the way to our children that life has nothing to do with having our desires met instantly and real love lies in guiding them on principles that will help them grow into responsible and thoughtful human beings.
Real Love through Discipline.
We as parents need to change our thinking because giving money is not love. Real love is teaching a child responsibility, how to work to get what they want, and being contented with little things in life. Times may change, but the essence of parenting shouldn’t. All that by promoting homemade preparations, reduction of unnecessary expenditure, and inculcating discipline in the children is far superior to the love Exhibit ‘A’ displayed than any amount of money we can give.
Just like my mother taught me with that two rupee note, it’s these small but significant acts which become the ‘tattoo marks’ of our children, helping them grow into responsible and grounded people in a world full of distractions.
(Writer is a Columnist and a Teacher By Profession and Can be Contacted on mukhtar.qur@gmail.com)